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CALL FOR SUBMISSION: Your Shitty Life
Nov. 29th, 2007 02:35 amMy ass remains unkissed nor adorned by rainbows. It's a self-esteem product really. This, you're reading it. Effortlessly idle and beautiful. Again, let me show you my good side. Avoid depth at all costs, nuances are messy. So we meet at this consumerist commons. An intersection of what did your buy? Where did you go? Who did you fuck and oh I like that or him or there too. Best friends forever.
I guess I'm just a humourless freak. Which is hardly true actually. I'm told I have a great sense of humour, of course by people I like. But I can be a little goth too. Actually I object to that word "goth" because it has Marilyn Manson baggage. Morose is a little more truthful. Very morose and interested in that stuff that isn't all unicorns flying out of your butthole while you explode into a being of pure light. I need to stop faking it. Maybe you do too? I feel more Jenna Jameson than Dolly Parton and that shit is tired. It's time to real it up and write about my shitty and real life. Maybe you could too?
Here, let me start.
Last night I went to a college party. I drank a whole bottle of Port wine and smoked lots of pot. It was a whole bunch of fun but my mouth runs off my face when I'm lit. I'm the sorta guy cabbies hate. LISTEN TO MY DRIVEL ABOUT LOCAL POLITICS! Like the cabby fucking cares. Really when I wake up after a night out on the piss that's the thing I feel most guilty about. I'm fine with annoying people at parties. And I don't even have to pay them. Funny that.
I woke up without a hang over and went to work for 2PM when a debt collector called me at work. Very humiliating. You see I had a grocery store credit card that I, well, sorta got cognitively dissonant about when I was supporting my former roommate. For some reason the gentleman, John from Canadian Debt Recovery, managed to guilt me into paying him. He made all those idle threats like taking me to court, which I would have preferred really because Judges are nice and listen to you. But I coughed up the money because I am living at home with my Mom and I have hundreds of dollars that aren't paying for Matt's hydro or subsidizing Doug's rent.
I'm more bitter and emo than I ever was at 22. I look at the overall arch of my life in the last 5-7 years and I think, hmm, maybe I am doing things out of order again? It's common for me. Maybe I need to be a pissy emo kid and cry and be clinically depressed? But I'm not getting dorky tattoos because that would just be unstoppably lame and 00s.
So, please, tell me about YOUR shitty life. Comments are fine but even better that you write your own entry.
I guess I'm just a humourless freak. Which is hardly true actually. I'm told I have a great sense of humour, of course by people I like. But I can be a little goth too. Actually I object to that word "goth" because it has Marilyn Manson baggage. Morose is a little more truthful. Very morose and interested in that stuff that isn't all unicorns flying out of your butthole while you explode into a being of pure light. I need to stop faking it. Maybe you do too? I feel more Jenna Jameson than Dolly Parton and that shit is tired. It's time to real it up and write about my shitty and real life. Maybe you could too?
Here, let me start.
Last night I went to a college party. I drank a whole bottle of Port wine and smoked lots of pot. It was a whole bunch of fun but my mouth runs off my face when I'm lit. I'm the sorta guy cabbies hate. LISTEN TO MY DRIVEL ABOUT LOCAL POLITICS! Like the cabby fucking cares. Really when I wake up after a night out on the piss that's the thing I feel most guilty about. I'm fine with annoying people at parties. And I don't even have to pay them. Funny that.
I woke up without a hang over and went to work for 2PM when a debt collector called me at work. Very humiliating. You see I had a grocery store credit card that I, well, sorta got cognitively dissonant about when I was supporting my former roommate. For some reason the gentleman, John from Canadian Debt Recovery, managed to guilt me into paying him. He made all those idle threats like taking me to court, which I would have preferred really because Judges are nice and listen to you. But I coughed up the money because I am living at home with my Mom and I have hundreds of dollars that aren't paying for Matt's hydro or subsidizing Doug's rent.
I'm more bitter and emo than I ever was at 22. I look at the overall arch of my life in the last 5-7 years and I think, hmm, maybe I am doing things out of order again? It's common for me. Maybe I need to be a pissy emo kid and cry and be clinically depressed? But I'm not getting dorky tattoos because that would just be unstoppably lame and 00s.
So, please, tell me about YOUR shitty life. Comments are fine but even better that you write your own entry.
