Is Committal the New Freedom?

[nfotxn]

Jesus christ I haven't got laid in two months. I mean the layage I can take care of with my good friend masturbation.

What really sucks is the lack of affection.

I'm starting to think that maybe I've developed issues around giving and receiving it. Which would be bitterly ironic given that it is my anti-thesis of self. I'm a very affectionate person. When I was a little kid I used to hug and kiss random strangers on the street. I quickly learned this wasn't a good thing but my perspective really hasn't changed a whole lot despite being a little more reserved.

I guess it is that whereas in the past I was pretty egalitarian with my affection in my adult life. That is in the sense that I felt everyone was worthy of affection regardless of how likely I was to get down with them. A few bad experiences have of course comprimised my better nature again. Now I feel as if I must save it for somebody special. Such that my investment is returned, so to speak.

Rational (possibly?) acrobatics aside I still need some affection. The good kind.

Comments

[sibs.livejournal.com]

We are human and we need to be loved. Plain. Simple. Thats why we have our fiends. Granted the love is not on the same level as a comitted relationship but it is a lot still. And even though they may not be around, there are a lot of guys on here who care about you Im sure.

"Sometimes we just have to stop looking forward and take a look around us."

*hugz*

[dirtyglamour.livejournal.com]

Crazy. That is EXACTLY what has been going through my mind the past week or so... You have no idea. Sometimes you just wonder if you are giving off some sort of "don't touch me" vibe to people, unbeknownst to yourself...you know?

[goofybearz.livejournal.com]

Damn, I could have almost wrote this. I have been thinking this way lately. I may new at all this bear stuff, but some of the limited experience I have had. At the time, I thought were a good thing and I probably needed to do them. However, it has had this other down the road effect, that I did not anticipate. And maybe all I want is some long-term friendship, that could turn in to something beyond that. But, I don't know,my situation is a probably a little different, being I'm cut off from other bears for periods of time and have nothing to do but think about it. And I use the internet to stay in touch, which in my opinion is unhealthy at times. But, you do what you have to I guess. But, one thing I do know is that I crave interaction and affection with other bears and not necessarily the rhythmic kind. I guess I want to do that with somebody that feels it's that special to them too, not just another day at the factory, type of thing. *Damn, I did not intend this to be this long*

[fenwalker.livejournal.com]

Don't they have sheep where you're at?

[xbearxrx.livejournal.com]

I'm planning some projects for you.


P.S.: I'm wearing a Broken Social Scene t-shirt.

[notofthisworld.livejournal.com]

I'm starting to think that maybe I've developed issues around giving and receiving it.

Oh, I think you're pretty good at giving and receiving affection. I think you just have a problem with intimacy.

Intimacy is not the same thing as affection. Intimacy is like being trapped in a dark room, and it's scary, isn't it?

Intimacy is when you share something which you wouldn't usually share with anyone else.

Of course, you can just bitch-slap me if you think I'm out of line. I don't mean to come across all creepy or anything. I'm just saying this as someone who reads your journal.

[(Anonymous)]

Affection, as love are very strong human conditions, we all need them and give them everyday, sometimes people even take it for granted, Specailly those who are in a LTR (can be a friendship or more than that)Is up to all of us to make things better, like I always said "After all this years I still melt when he looks at me and smiles". We love our cats, dogs, friends and family. I remember when the attack on 9/11 happened on NYC, everybody freaked out in the office, and for months I started recieving mails and calls from people close to me, telling me how much they care, and I did the same. Don't be afraid of loving and telling people how much you care for them, you'll find how much comes back. (OMG I sound like a preacher) anyway, give and recieve everyday ! ;-)

:: n33o ::

[gaminaca.livejournal.com]

you know i'm a kuddle fanatic! come visit me in TO and we can do many happy things!

if you have a chance, e-mail me some time before you leave and it shall be done.


- M.